This is the only place I can let go of all my insecurities. I know I should be packing but I simply need to clear my mind. I honestly wish Jie, or Adonnis, or anyone was with me right now. Anyone. This is not my cry for help. This is my cry for companionship. I'm sick of being lonely but I'm also sick of being and getting hurt all the time.

Kevin, there is nothing else I have to say to you. You hurt me, a lot. You know, I wasn't too fond of you at first but you got me. You found a way in. I broke down those walls and allowed you in because I believed in you. I believed in us. But here we are. You know, I feel pretty stupid right about now. For ever believing in anything you've ever told me. I want to say I hate you for it, and parts of me do. I'm just so tired.

I can only imagine what Jie has been going through for the past year.

You made a promise that you obviously couldn’t keep. I hope you realize that you’re a douchebag. You know, I’ve done so much to try to reach out to you. And I know you’re fucking there, but you won’t reply. This ‘problem’ has plagued me for over a week now and I’m fucking tired of it. 

For a moment there, I thought you were different. We made all these plans and talked about all these things. For the past few days, I kept telling myself ‘Oh, maybe he’s just busy or his phone’s not working.’ You know what? Fuck you. 

I should have known from the very beginning. All the doubts I had about you were correct. I was right. You are that player that I made you out to be. Oh, I just want to laugh at myself for being stupid enough to ever believe in you and anything you’ve ever said.

‘I’ll falling for a girl who doesn’t want to be committed’ Bullshit.

‘I promise. I’ll never leave you.’ Bullshit. 

You’re so full of crap. I hope no other girl ever has to go through what you’ve put me through. You know what’s even funnier? I’m not even heartbroken. I feel like I’ve anticipated this very moment for a long time now. 

At this point, just go away. Don’t bother. Delete my number, sn, and all that good stuff because I’ve already deleted yours.

But thank you, for the temporary happiness that you did bring me. Granted it was false happiness, but happiness all the same. If you ask me if I’ll cherish the memories, I probably will but I’ll do my best to ignore the unhappy ending. 

I won’t look at this as a bump in the road, because I don’t think there’s any pavement beyond this. I don’t want there to be. 

Goodbye, KVD. 

Oh and one more thing. Learn the difference between then and than. Holy fuck, man. 

I wrote that for my tumblr but I didn't want to post it because I didn't want to put you on blast and I didn't want to publicize it. I didn't want to give you the satisfaction of knowing that I was thinking about you. You don't deserve my thoughts and certainly don't deserve my heart. Therefore, I'm writing this here. I've deleted your number, deleted your sn, unfollowed you and ripped your page out of my diary. I don't plan on keeping it because I don't plan on remembering you. You're going to fade into obscurity. From this day on, I won't care. Even if you tried to reach out to me, I won't bother. Yes, I would love an explanation. But I've seen what you've done to those other girls. I know. Don't think I don't. I'm a girl. We have our way of finding things out, and I know your little secrets. I know why that girl keeps telling you to call her. I know. I want to hurt you like you've hurt me. I want to slap you across the face. I want to break your heart into a million pieces. I want karma to come back and bite you on the ass. I want you to feel the pain that I've felt for the past fucking week. I don't need your bullshit.

I think I'm more angry at myself for allowing you in after Angel and for ever believing in you. I'm so fucking gullible. Well you know what? Fuck you, kid. Fuck you. Go play in traffic.